Jealousy or Submission?

1 05 2006

Jealousy or Submission?

1 Chronicles 15:29 (NIV)  As the ark of the covenant of the LORD was entering the City of David, Michal daughter of Saul watched from a window. And when she saw King David dancing and celebrating, she despised him in her heart.

2 Samuel 6:21-22 (NIV) 21 David said to Michal, “It was before the LORD, who chose me rather than your father or anyone from his house when he appointed me ruler over the LORD’s people Israel—I will celebrate before the LORD. 22 I will become even more undignified than this, and I will be humiliated in my own eyes.

Matthew 18:35 (NIV)  “This is how my heavenly Father will treat each of you unless you forgive your brother from your heart.”

Jealousy.  Envy.  Spite.  Anger.  Frustration.  Fear.  Hurt.  

What is it that caused Michal to despise David in her heart?  Was it just his dance of celebration?  I don’t think so.  I believe it goes back much further.  It probably goes back to David rejecting her as his wife.  Saul had offered his daughter Michal to David after he killed Goliath, but David rejected her.  Later he married a couple of different women.

“Hell hath no fury, like a woman scorned.”

Often, women will get their worth from their desirability.  Attractiveness, beauty, desire – when a man looks on a woman and wants her, that will often give some women what they think they need.  That doubles the sting of rejection.  

None of us like to be rejected.  It hurts.  But we can often move on after the rejection – or to save face and be preemptive, we will often reject others before they can reject us.  This is the dance that singles do today.  There is interest, inquiry, and decisions to be made.  To accept or reject the implied offers.  But in the days of arranged marriages, the woman had very little power to reject the man.  And when a good man like David came along, it would be in her best interests to “go for it!”

David was a warrior and a national hero.  He was attractive, kind, humble, and destined to be the next king.  Michal’s other options were limited.  David was the best of the best.  But, alas, he rejected her.

No wonder she was hurt.  That would be a bitter pill to swallow.

So, now, as David danced before the Lord, here was her opportunity to get back at him – at least in her eyes.  This is the man who usurped her father, rejected her beauty and love, and is now putting her to shame for his devotion to the Lord.

It is too late to play the “I’ll reject you before you reject me” game, but it isn’t too late to reject him and try to make it look like it is a good thing that she is not with him.  You can just here her saying, “Why would anyone want to be with such a shameful man?”

But David doesn’t blink.  “If this is undignified,” he says, “I strive to be even more undignified than this!”

The only recourse for Michal is to forgive David for the slights she perceived – especially since they were not malevolent.  David wasn’t trying to hurt Michal – he was only looking out for his best interests.  In behaving this way, she is only proving his case that she would not have made a good wife.  Her heart was not after God’s heart – it was after her own interests.  This proves that David made a good choice in seeking a different wife.

Sometimes in the course of doing God’s will, people will be wounded.  It isn’t intentional, but it is often unavoidable.  If they were in alignment with God’s purposes they would have options other than to be hurt and jealous.  First, they could realize that it is God’s will and they could humbly accept the decisions made;  second, they could see that they were not rejected as much as God’s way was accepted;  and third, they would see that the leader is truly seeking to do God’s will is not evil.

Jealousy.  Envy.  Spite.  Anger.  Frustration.  Fear.  Hurt.  These are all dangerous, hurtful, and evil emotions.  The only recourse is to forgive – just like Jesus has forgiven us.

Father God, I pray for those who have been hurt.  I pray for those who have been wounded.  I pray for the people who feel oppressed and put down.  Give them a glimpse of who they really are!  Let them see your love, compassion, and pity.  Let them forget the lack of fairness in the world and accept your direction – at all costs!

Lord, continue to give me a love for the broken people of the world.

Let me love others with the same love you have for them!





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